A Letter To My Prepubescent Child

Dear Child,

Yes, this letter is for you, the child who rolls your eyes and lets that "tone" creep into your voice; the one who tells me "no" when I tell you to do something, after I've asked you nicely before resorting to the "do it now" command. I'm going to impart some wisdom here. Pay attention, because I will NOT repeat myself. 

When you, my darling child, decide to behave like a little shit, you might want to remember a few things. 

First, I am your mother. I will be your mother for the rest of your life. You're ten/eleven years old now. You've got at least eight to ten more  years at home. That means you deal with me. Every. Single. Day. For. The. Next. Decade. Think about it. 

Second, although I'm more tolerant than my mother, I do have a breaking point. You have passed the point, my love. That is not wise. 

Third, you should understand that all of the electronics, toys, and other assorted crap you have, are privileges that can disappear faster than an unguarded birthday cake around yours truly. 

And finally, you will be a parent one day. And I sincerely hope I'm around then. If not, I will leave a detailed list of all of the bullshit you pulled for my grandchildren. Why? Because that's the way I roll, my sweet. And be warned, the apple does not fall too far from the tree. How do I know? Because you're just like...your dad! (You didn't think I'd say me, did you?!)

Love,

Mom

Winter Preparedness For Travelers

I've been reading about all these people stranded on highways during this winter storm. Instead of commenting on social media, because it turns into a free-for-all, I'm posting this on my blog. 

I am NOT an expert! These are things I've learned from reading, researching and asking questions. Do your own research and adjust for your needs. 

I read, follow, visit websites, own books on survival and preparedness. Because of that, I keep certain supplies in my vehicle at all times. There's no "crazy prepper mentality" here; just common sense. (And FYI, I don't believe that the majority of preppers are crazy.)

I had to evacuate our home in Virginia in 2003 due to a hurricane. I was frantically grabbing things that seemed important. I forgot a lot and took some things that made no sense. I was in panic mode. Lesson learned. 

I have a backpack purchased from a nearby surplus store. It's much like something you'd see military carry. This bag stays in my vehicle. In this bag, I have a multi-tool, manual can opener, fire starter, flashlight, extra clothing, first aid supplies, Chapstick (which is good for starting fires), sunscreen, bug spray, medicine (headache, allergy, stomach, and needed prescription medications), reflective blankets, disposable tooth brushes, antibacterial wipes, baby wipes, granola bars, and water. 

I also have a walking/hiking stick, rain gear, blankets (thin fleece blankets enclosed in zippered plastic bags), additional first aid supplies, puzzle books, cards, travel games, pens and paper. Those items are in permanent residence in my vehicle. 

My three boys have a backpack always at the ready in the front entry of our house. When we travel anywhere, they carry the bags with them. These bags contain basic first aid kits, flashlights, a change of clothes, a granola bar or trail mix and water, and a book or two. 

I'm going to ask that you do this right now. Get a backpack, duffle bag, old purse, box, ANYTHING you have and put basic supplies in it. Put it in your vehicle. It just might save your life. 

You CAN freeze to death in the middle of a busy city. You CAN die from dehydration ANY time. Snow is frozen water, but be aware that if you eat snow it can lower your core temperature. 

If you are traveling anywhere, keep your gas tank full. Pay attention to weather conditions. 

There are some great free resources out there regarding preparedness. Please use them. Don't be caught unprepared. 

As always, thank you for reading. Be blessed, be kind, and be safe. Peace and love. 

Holidays

Mamaw had all the family at her house for Christmas when we were growing up. She had five children, nine grandchildren, and later a plethora of great grandchildren. Her house was always full. Not everyone made it to every Christmas, but the doors were always open. We'd always enjoy ourselves, and I miss that. 

When Christmas rolls around now, I think of those times fondly. And yes, I miss her. But really, I'm at peace because she's still here in my heart, in my memories. And I share those memories with my children, who never got to meet her. I'm sure she's arranging celebrations with all the angels right now.

My dad loved Christmas. When we were children, he and Mom would stay up putting together Santa toys and getting things under the tree, only to be awakened too early the next morning to see the gifts left by Santa.  In my adult years, he decorated and went all out for Christmas. Normally, starting Thanksgiving when he'd invariably blow a fuse right while my stepmother was cooking. He's with his dad, his mom, his brother and sister, his great nieces, and many other loved ones. Probably trying to talk God into letting him string Christmas lights all over heaven. He's cancer-free and at peace. 

Grandma and Grandpa (maternal) are watching over their children, grandchildren and great grandchildren on Christmas morning, knowing the gift of learning was passed down to those they never got a chance to hold. 

I miss them all, but I feel a sense of peace, knowing they are watching over us. And that they are free of pain and suffering. And they're my angels, each and every one. 

Thanks for reading. Merry Christmas and God bless. And may you have peace in your heart and know you are loved. 

Random Acts of Kindness, Not Violence

My boys and I started making up small bags of food and drinks for the local homeless several years ago.  We'd see them standing with signs asking for help. We'd hand them a bag. So, we know they get something to eat that day. And each time, I say "God bless."

Be kind. Show compassion. Perform one act of kindness. You will be blessed as much as, or more than, those you help. It doesn't cost much. 

We bought a package of brown paper bags (can be used as a campfire starter--yes, many of our local homeless camp out). In those bags, we put a granola bar or cereal bar, a can of Vienna sausages or potted meat, a bottle of water or a small juice box, a plastic spoon to eat the canned meat, and a piece of candy. Each bag we make costs around $1 or so. It's a part of our tithing that directly helps those that are shunned or ignored. 

Blessings and Merry Christmas to each of you. May you be blessed with joy, peace and health. 

Sweet Potato Pie And Lumber

I had sweet potato pie for breakfast in memory of my Mamaw (who made the best ones ever) and Daddy (who loved sweet potato pie as much as me). 

Mamaw died February 2000 and yesterday would have been her 100th birthday. Daddy died November 8, 2010 and tomorrow will be rough for me and my family. I miss them both so much. 

Mamaw was the glue that held our family together. She knew everybody's secrets and never breathed a word to anyone. She taught me to bake biscuits from "scratch" and let me mess up her kitchen experimenting with recipes. 

Daddy was strict and overprotective of his girls, but it was out of love. It took me a long time to realize that. He taught me to love creating, both the process and the end product. He did woodworking and I still love the smell of sawdust and lumber. I can walk through the lumber aisle in Lowe's and be transported to his shop. I still have the first piece of furniture he made for me and hope to pass it on to my oldest son. 

Because of Dad, I can do basic troubleshooting on cars--except for changing a flat, which for some reason I never learned. 

My gift to my children is to teach them the things my mamaw and my dad taught me. And I tell them where every lesson was learned. My dad even started writing a few months before he died. He said I inspired him to do so. They both may be gone from this earthly existence, but they're always in my heart. Memories, both good and bad, are a gift. 

Walk The Walk

This post was inspired by an incident that happened a few weeks ago. A person I've known all my life posted a nasty little rant on social media about a young mother with bratty children she wasn't trying to control. This incident happened in a hospital waiting room. When several of us made comments that we wondered why she (the young mother) was in a hospital waiting room and perhaps offering help was a good idea, we were met with nasty comments and/or blocked from her account. This incident disappointed me, because it was so mean spirited. And the woman who posted it was someone I thought highly of. 

So, here is my perspective as the mom of a "brat", as she described these children she saw. The mom who has had to wrangle three active boys, alone much of the time, because we've always lived away from extended family. As I was thinking about all of this, an incident came to mind. Here it is:

My youngest boy has ALWAYS had meltdowns. Until he was diagnosed with ADHD, we did a lot of behavioral conditioning. Ignoring was the

hardest, but the most effective. I had all three with me in Walmart and my youngest started screaming. He wanted something and I said "No". He had screamed through most of the store and I was barely holding it together. My other two had their hands over their ears, begging me to give him what he wanted. I wouldn't give in. 

I received nasty looks and heard snide remarks as I made my way through the store. As I loaded the boys into the van, wrestling my youngest into his seatbelt, a woman approached me. She waited until I was done, put her hand on my arm and said, "Good job. You are a good mother and you did great!"

My eyes filled with tears as I thanked her. I don't know her and never saw her again, but she kept me going that day. Instead of being judgmental, she embodied the Christian spirit. Compassion. Love. Kindness. That's all it took to make one overwhelmed mother feel like going on instead of giving up. 

Thanks for reading and be blessed. 

September 11th, Honor The Fallen

9/11/2001 I was in Mississippi, my new husband was in training several states away. When I heard the news, like everyone else I was stunned. After hours of unsuccessful attempts to call my husband on base, I finally reached him. We were weeks away from a transfer to Norfolk, VA Navy Base. He was waiting to find out whether he needed to fly out or to stay until his scheduled transfer. 

I asked, "What can we do?" (Meaning those of us watching the repeated coverage of the attacks.) 

He said, "Go on with life. Don't feed the media frenzy, don't let it consume you." 

Today, on the 14th anniversary of this horrid tragedy, I will honor the memory of those who were killed, both during the attacks and during search and rescue. I will honor those brave men and women who fight to protect this country. I will NOT give in to the hate and fear of another religion because of a select group of people. I will honor those who lost their lives and their loved ones with my thoughts and prayers. 

Be blessed.