Monday, January 19, 2015

Ribbons And Buttons And Beads, Oh Yeah!

I, the grand poobah of the castle, her majesty of the domicile have declared that no child is allowed to purchase a new toy without donating a toy to charity (or selling said toy). In the spirit of "setting a good example" and being a "positive role model", I started cleaning up my "toys" (AKA crafting supplies, notebooks, etc) and have realized I need to evaluate my supply. 

I have this unique (and by unique, I mean completely common) problem. I hoard crafting supplies. I cannot pass by a clearance rack of, oh let's say ribbon, (hideously horrific ribbon the color of runny yellow baby poop--you parents out there know what I mean). ANYway, if I see the clearance sign on RBPY (runny baby poop yellow) ribbon, my mind churns. This would make a lovely gift for Aunt Lucy's second cousin's brother's girlfriend's pet armadillo! (Hey, work with me people!) So, I buy all 45 cases of the stuff; envisioning all the ooo's and ah's that will occur when the glorious gift is opened. 

I get home and realize what a find this was! There are so many more things I could make with the RBPY ribbon! Perhaps I'll start a RBPY fashion line for armadillos! And make matching assessories for the owners of said armadillos! I'll be the RBPY Armadillo Assessory Queen! Her Majesty of the....Um, yeah, well...(clears throat and smiles maniacally).

So I'm on a mission to organize the craft kingdom. (Queen of the Kingdom of Crafts...has a nice ring, eh?) I'm happy to say I can now see small spaces of floor and that no one will be buried under mountains of craft supplies when walking through the room. My new rule for me? No craft supplies in until one bin is out. (Unless I happen to find a killer sale on RBPY ribbon! I mean, think of all the armadillos I can make happy!)

Love, peace and laughter!

Sunday, January 18, 2015

If You Give Grace a Bead Reamer and Glue

If you give Grace a bead reamer, she'll need a bandage.
She'll trip on her way to get the bandage and knock over the permanent bond glue.
When she knocks over the glue, she'll bend down to pick it up and hit her head.
When she hits her head, she'll fall.
When she falls, she'll land in the glue.
When she lands in the glue, she'll stick to the floor.
When she sticks to the floor, she'll get angry and slam her hand down on her leg.
When she hits her leg, she'll forget she's holding the bead reamer until she sees the blood.
When she sees the blood, she'll remember she needs a bandage.