Sunday, July 21, 2013

Let's Talk Attraction

What do you find attractive when you're searching for a significant other? I know I'll hear about good bodies, hair, eyes, and the rest of the physical attractions. But that's not what I mean. Of course, you want to be physically attracted to your significant other. But that can't be all of it.

The physical attributes fade. That tattoo of a hummingbird on her hip that's so attractive now, will turn into a screaming vulture that travels on a downward slope to her thigh....or her knee....or ankle. Gravity will take over, don't doubt it. The head full of think hair will recede until his head looks like a cue ball. And those flat stomachs and rock hard abs will turn to "spare tires" and "love handles". Or c-section scars and stretch marks.

What else do you find yourself attracted to? For me, it's intelligent conversation, a sense of humor, an open mind. It's trips to new places, getting lost and discovering something new. It's quiet walks on the beach or up a mountain trail. It's finding a "mountain lion sighting" sign and racing to it, giggling, snapping pictures in front of it. It's getting lost on a "shortcut" home and finding a little cabin in the middle of nowhere to stay the night.

It's watching him play silly games with a baby. Hearing him sing to quiet a frightened child in the middle of a barbershop packed with men. Watching him sleep with a sick baby on his chest so the little one can rest. It's patience and soft words. It's a quiet strength. It's security and belonging. It's her voice singing a lullaby, slightly off tune. Whispers and kisses to take away bad dreams or hurt feelings. It's knowing without a word, what someone needs from you. It's giving that attention when you have nothing more to give.

I find those things more attractive than physical appearance. Do you agree?

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